The landlord agent cometh..........

Every six months I get the landlords agent doing an inspection of the Blue Mountains pad.. It's a lot like having your Mum around to visit, everything has to be spic and span, in order and ship shape. Stuff that I should be doing gets done a couple of days before the agent arrives. Not that I'm untidy or dirty, it's more a case of "man tidiness" where you can get away with some crud around the joint and not be bothered by the whole fingermarks on the refrigerator deal.

As long as it is functional, doesn't smell and poses no immediate danger to personal and public health, it's cool in my books.

I used to give the place a real good once over when my girlfriend used to visit but alas we are no longer. So the joint misses out on the "detailing" until the agent arrives. This includes the garden which necessitates hiring a rather brutal but effective Honda 4 stroke weed whacker from up the road every six months.

Stuff I found out today.

1 Bic razor blade covers near the bathroom bin. I found a family of them in the corner. Either they decided to go forth and multiply or I am a lousy shot.

2. Cobwebs do not dissolve. Add to this, the cobweb sweeper which I bought for the last inspection could not be found. It eventually was located on the balcony with severe sun-fading. Living in a National Park has the advantages and disadvantages of natural living. An entire micro ecosystem and I co-exist within the walls. The only thing that gets shooed outside is really big spiders and ants which are kept away by keeping the kichen clean.

3. Three tomato plants which I had given up over summer had decided the lack of attention is what required to bear fruit. I now have some excellent Italian tomatoes which will make a great pasta sauce tonight, an oregano bush had gone feral too which will also make a good accompaniment. Alas the tortellini bush had died.

4. The semi unused room with car interiors and the ironing board in it. The iron was still ON from the last time I ironed a shirt about three weeks ago (I think). Cotton clothes that don't need ironing DO have their disadvantages. Leaving stuff on such as stoves and irons was one of the things that used to freak my ex-wife out. So now I can say I have bench tested the safety aspect of a Sunbeam iron over three weeks and it comes through with flying colours. No harm was done......can't wait to see the next power bill.

5 The black cat had been sick at some stage and decided to barf over the carpet in another spare room which I rarely visit. I could go into gory details but the remedy was suprisingly simple and effective.

6 Dead bugs and moths tend to stand out on smooth, white stuff such as baths, handbasins etc and get hidden by more neutral items such as carpet.

7 Dropped cigarette ash is a bastard to get out of carpet.

8 Indian incense sticks not only balance the chakras but mask cigarette smoke rather well.

Anyway the inspection went without a hitch, the agent is pretty cool and seems to have more sympathy for me than the landlord. She's a fellow JJJ devotee and we talked about music and such things for a while before a quick whisk around the pad which she described as "Same as last time."(if only she knew)..... Over in about 5 minutes flat.

I'll see her again in a few months.